Singing...

Emelyn has been really big into singing lately...

Pumpkin Patch

On Saturday we picked up Tyasia and spent the morning together at the Vanzant Fruit Stand/Pumpkin Patch. Emelyn loves Tyasia and wanted to either hold her hand or else be held by her the entire time. We had such a fun, relaxing time (including one quite ornery 2 year old that refused to smile normal anytime the camera was out.) 

 The pumpkin she finally chose for herself.

Saying Goodbye to Charles...

We're not sure what to say. In Arkansas mothers have 5-10 days to revoke their decision to adopt. When we picked Charles up Monday we knew there was one day left of the 5 days. The mother had never waivered in her decision to adopt from 29 weeks on, and the caseworkers and everyone involved were confident that she wasn't going to change her mind. We knew this when she was pregnant and had planned on being there when he was born.

We honestly hadn't even thought about the possibility of her changing her mind. We brought the sweet guy home, had a great evening with him and put him to bed around 7:45. Then we took shifts throughout the night holding, feeding and changing him. He was a champion eater and sleeper - such an easy baby! Sometime during the night we went from "Can you believe we have a baby in the other room?" to the next morning being truly in love with our son. It felt as though he'd always been a part of our family. He was a part of our family - our baby boy, Emelyn's little brother.

Tuesday we had a leisurely morning talking with him, loving on him and then taking him to the doctor late in the morning for a checkup. He had failed his hearing test in both ears when he was born so we wanted that checked as well as his overall health. (Still don't know on the hearing - we needed to take him to a specialist for further testing.) We came home, and all went down for naps. Then we received a call at 2pm, 3 hours before the time would run out. Charlies mom was at the courthouse which could only mean one thing... she had changed her mind.

So we cried, prayed, and went from being angry (how could she do this at the last minute) to being prideful (why would God want Charles with her and not us.) But ultimately we knew that it was out of our control. We clung to the truth... that God knew every day of Charlies life before he was conceived (Psalm 139:16)... that we needed to trust God, not ourselves, and lean on and acknowledge that his plans are better than ours (Proverbs 3:4-6)... and that God's timing is perfect even when we don't understand it (Eccl 8:6.)

God eventually gave us a heart of compassion, for both Charlie and his mom. We don't know why we would only have him for 2 days, but trusted that God was using those 2 days for his own glory. So we gathered everything we could think of that she would need - diapers, wipes, formula, bottles as well as any gifts that he had received from friends - even a cute balloon - and packed it up for her. Then we sat and wrote her a letter - telling her what a priviledge it was to love on her son, and that we would never forget our short precious days together. I gave her a detailed report of his checkup along with what he eats, how often and how much. We told her he likes to be held close, not facing outward. That he will only sleep on his own if he's tightly swaddled, and laid on his right side on a wedge sleep positioner. He has to be upright for at least 20 minutes after eating to avoid spitting up.

Then we spent the night again taking turns holding and caring for him. His little hands clung to our fingers as we held him. This morning he had a good hour of awake time, and during that time he just stared into our eyes - going from person to person as we talked to him, prayed for him and sang to him. And at 9:30 we gave him back to be taken to his mom in Little Rock.

We can't begin to pretend like we aren't sad; we ache for our son. We miss his long skinny fingers and his big feet.... his soft curly hair, and his little dimple... his soft coos and the way he fights his diaper changes... his big brown eyes and soft skin. In our hearts he was our son and will always feel that way. And as much as we love him after 2 days, we can't begin to imagine the pain and agony his mother went through these last 5 days as well as the amount of love she had for him after 9 months of pregnancy.

We will never forget our little Charlie.

The last picture we took of him...



Meet our precious son!

Today we met and fell in love with our baby boy.

Charles Joseph Cersovsky

Born October 14, 2010 @ 6:18am

7 lbs 6 oz, 19.5 inches long

Thank you all for praying for us today. Everything went really smoothly - such a special and memorable day. We definately felt the Lord's presense with us - one of those days we'll never forget for sure. The family that has been keeping Charles the last few days met us at the office and prayed over Charles and our family before we left. Such a sweet serving family! We were all teary eyed as we lifted Charles up to the Lord, praying that he would seek to make the Lord's name great, not his own; praying that he would be a man after God's own heart; praying for his birth mother, thankful she chose life; praying for us as we raise and train him in the years to come. Such a sweet time with our brothers and sisters in Christ.

Meeting him for the very first time

 Hearing all about his first few days

 Praying with dear friends in Christ

 Being burped after his first feeding... such soft, curly hair!

 Emelyn's in love. She says "Baby Charlie is SO CUTE!" nonstop. She also gives us a play by play of everything he does even though we're right there. She's such a big helper!

 Laying at home for the first time



Someone's world is about to change!

This weekend we have been busy busy busy getting rooms switched, furniture moved, clothes washed, things bought, floors cleaned (the entire house actually - who knows when we'll have time/energy to clean again?) And Emelyn has been going with the flow, excited to help, and talks non-stop about Baby Charles - "Wanna see baby Charles car seat momma?" Wanna see baby Charles clothes?" Where's baby Charles?"

Tying her bumper pad back onto her crib in her new room.

 And tonight she enjoyed a long game of tackle football with daddy.

Birthday Fun

On Tuesday, October 12th, Emelyn turned 2! Even though we had a family party planned for that weekend, we decided to invite some friends to the park to play on her actual birthday.

The two birthday kiddos - Benjamin and Emelyn - exactly one year apart. Unfortunately, it was pretty much impossible to get them both to look at the camera at the same time. They were more concerned about their cupcakes. :)

 Since we ended up being home for the weekend, both sets of grandparents and some Aunts/Uncles/Cousins came over while Emelyn opened some presents. It's so much fun to watch her - she gets so excited about everything...

 ...even tissue paper. This gift bag was full of it and she pulled one sheet out at a time exclaiming "Oh! Lookie there! More trash!"

 That and, "Oh wow! A box!"

 ...and panties...

 And a package of 200 ponytails - which she loves to take out, then try to put back in (but end up all over the house.) Thanks, mom. :)

Despite the sad cirumstances on her birthday (Great-Grandpa Cersovsky dying) and also the night she opened presents (visitation at funeral home,) I think she enjoyed her birthday!

Nails with Hayley

I just loaded pics off of our camera in preparation for tomorrow and found some pictures from last Monday night. Hayley came over for supper and Emelyn met her at the door with her fingers out, asking if they could paint them. Hayley had brought her polish, and after supper, Emelyn spent a good 10 minutes stewing over her options. Literally. 10 minutes. Then she chose a pink.

Update

Whew what a week! I don't have much time but wanted to say something since we haven't said anything in a week. Monday we had our homestudy and all went well. We learned more about the potential birth mom and her situation/circumstances. We also found out that if all went as it seemed it would go, that her baby boy would be our son. Then Tuesday morning (Emelyn's birthday) we found out Jake's grandfather had died. We continued with Emelyn's birthday party that morning/afternoon then spent the rest of the day packing and doing laundry to go to KS. Wednesday we left for KS, knowing that at any time we could get a call that the birthmom was in labor and have to turn around to go to Little Rock. We arrived in KS around 10pm and this morning spent time with family, while also getting a few baby things since we knew we could be in Little Rock at any time. Then, this afternoon around 4pm we received a call, that our baby boy was born this morning! The mother went into labor during the night and had him this morning. The case worker went to see her as soon as she received word and the mother was ready to sign papers and move on....

SO... WE HAVE A SON!!!! He was 7 lbs, 6 oz, 19.5 inches long and as cute as can be. Lots of curly black hair. So adorable. We're in love!

He will be discharged tomorrow and will go to a sweet caring family that will take care of him during "interim care." We will go to Little Rock Monday morning to sign all of the legal documents and to bring him home. Tuesday is the last day that the birthmother has the right to change her mind and after that everything will be officially finalized.

And in the meantime... we need to go to bed! Tomorrow morning we will be celebrating Jake's grandfather's 96 years of life. Jake was very close to him and will miss him dearly. We have enjoyed spending time with all of his relatives while home and hate that we will have to cut it short to go home, but at the same time, we're anxious to hold our little boy!!

Please pray for safe travels as we drive back to AR tomorrow (9 hours) and then again Monday as we head to LR.

Exciting Announcement...

... we may soon be a family of four!

A couple of months ago we felt like we were maybe suppose to start the adoption process not sure of what/where/when/who... just knew that that's what we were suppose to do. After our first meeting with an agency we were both 110% sure.

I'm not sure there are words to describe what God has done in our hearts since that day. We find ourselves praying for and in love with this child and his birthmother that we've never even met. We have a deep compassion for the mother, knowing how hard the nine months will be that she's carrying our child. Everytime we do something as a family, we just know, that our family isn't complete yet.

A week ago we finally finished all of the paperwork and we sent off our application package. Yesterday we received a call saying they had received our packet, and hadn't had time to go through it officially yet, but were just curious if we were open to adopting different races. From day one (in fact, before we were even married) we've said we'd take whatever child we felt like God wanted for our family - race/gender/age didn't matter. That said, our answer was yes. And our case worker's response was how soon can we meet for your home study... there's a baby due any day that we have a feeling may be a child for you based on what we know of the birth mother's desires and your family.

And that's where we are. We will finish our homestudy Monday and in the meantime are waiting on a call that the baby has been born and what his mother wants to do. There's no baby that is officially our child yet, but it seems there is a high need for families due to an increase in adoptive birth mothers in our state. In Arkansas, a mother has 5-10 days to change her mind after she gives her baby to a family, so even if we were to bring a child home, there's still a chance that we wouldn't be his/her parents.

All this said - we felt like it was time to say something - we've known from the beginning that it could take years to meet our next child and saw no need to say anything until we at least were done with the legal side and in the waiting stage. But after this week, we wanted to say something in case if we have a baby a week from now. We would appreciate prayers as we begin this wait - prayers for us that we would know what God's will is for our family, and also prayers for the birthmother out there who is making the difficult decision as to what is best for her unborn son.

And on a lighter note ... are you curious what Emelyn thinks about all of this??

She's excited to be a big sister...

 Wondering if she has to give up her room and baby stuff...

 But quite excited all the same!



Bike Riding

 We've been going on a lot of bike rides lately to enjoy the cooler fall weather as much as we can. This afternoon was no exception - we spent two and half hours on two of the many trails Fayetteville has (one of the many things we love about our town!) Of course, we weren't riding that whole time - we had to stop and say hi to some friends who live along the trail!

Daddy & Emelyn before starting our ride. She put her arm around Jake and said "Momma, take picture!" A rare treat!

 Getting buckled in...

 A fake cheesy smile...

 While riding, we stopped at a new pediatric dental office that Jake "engineered" - he has been on the job site these past few weeks to check out the finished product and he has been saying how much he thinks Emelyn would like to see it - she did! Isn't that a fun outside design?!? Jake says the inside is even cooler...

 Stopping at our friend's house for a quick break, sweet time of fellowship and an attempt at a family picture.



Our little lady

One day this past week Emelyn and I were going to help a friend cook, then to meet another friend for lunch and finally stopped by the store on the way home for some produce. I told Emelyn to go pick out her clothes for the day and this is what she came out with:

 Complete with her reusable shopping bag!

She loves her boots and dresses!